Last September I lost my mother after years of illness and suffering. She had type II diabetes, was an amputee, had congestive heart failure, COPD, and was bordering on kidney failure. She was the strongest bravest person I have ever met and I cannot seem to get a handle on my grief.

I was her primary caregiver for the past nine years; my whole life revolved around her care. She had declined a lot last year but her death still caught me by surprise. I left her at the nursing home that last evening and by the time I made it home she had passed away due to a heart attack because her carbon dioxide levels were too high.

I cannot tell you how much of a void there is in my life. I miss her more than I thought possible and I just don’t know what to do with my time. I am single, and I lived my entire life with my mother. What does the caregiver do once the caregiving is over? What do you do with your time, with that void that nothing can fill? I work, and go to graduate school but it’s the down times, the evenings and weekends that are the most difficult.

Tammy C.aregiver


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